“Du-UUUUUUDE!!”
“What now?”
“Ya didn’t put the toilet paper on the roller right!”
“It’s on the roller, hey? I coulda just left it on top a the tank like normal. What more d’ya want? I didn’t know the thingy had a left.”
“Chick walks in here an’ sees this, ya might get a left. A left uppercut.”
“A chick? In here?!?”
“Could happen, dude. There’s always yer mother.”
“Ya tryin’ ta scare me, dude?”
“I’m tryin’ ta get ya ta fix the TP, dude!”
“Like fer why? What’s the diff?”
“Dude. The way ya got it now, the paper touches the wall afore it gets ta ya, an’ it gets crap on it …”
“BWA-hahahahahaaaaaa!!!”
“Aah shaddap, wiseass. Ya don’t want nobody else’s on there afore you use it.”
“So it’s this ‘touchin’ the wall’ thing that yer sweatin’, huh?”
“Yeah!”
“An’ so if I put it on the roller tha way you want, it, the paper never touches the wall at all, huh?”
“Yea… um …”
“Yeah. Um. An’ them sheets sittin’ out there pretty in the middle a tha room never get any, ah, spray on ’em?”
“Um …”
“So what’s the diff?”
“Dude …”
“What’s the diff? An’ wit’ all the important stuff goin’ down these days, why’re we sweatin’ goddam TP?”
“Ya mean, like, the economy, global warmin’, all that stuff?”
“I mean, like, how come there’s no beer in the fridge? Wasn’t it yer turn ta buy?”
“Oh, crap …”
Over — not to keep the toilet paper clean, to keep the WALL clean. Really.
Oh, and we’re not stocking the fridge with beer. Sorry.