“Wowser, dude!”
“Yeah, dude? What’s tha scoop?”
“Dammit, dude, if’n ya already know, what’re ya askin’ me fer?”
“Because, dude, like usual, I ain’t got a clue what the hell yer talkin’ about! All I said was, ‘What’s tha scoop?‘”
“What kind?”
“What .. kind ..”
“Spumoni? Mississippi mud? Cherry amaretto chip?”
“Ya ain’t helpin’ me, dude.”
“Fine. Go get yer own. But don’t tell me I ain’t never offered ya nothin’.”
“Go get my own what?!?”
“Ice cream, dude! Don’t tell me ya ain’t heard that it’s National Ice Cream Day today?!”
“OK, dude, I won’t. So that’s what this is all about. Ya could’ve just said so.”
“I just did. Sheesh. Timin’s perfect, too, it’s sure as hell hot enough. Think I’ll have me a …”
“Put .. that .. scoop .. down!!”
“WhaAat?!? Like fer why, dude??”
“Didn’t ya just get through tellin’ me that the ice cream was on holiday?”
“The ice cream is on holiday?”
“Yeah! Listen, dude. Do ya work on Labor Day?”
“Hell, no! ‘Course, we don’t work any other day neither …”
“Right. So Ice Cream Day is when we oughta give tha stuff a rest, hmm? Take the day off. Go to tha beach with tha kids. You know.”
“The beach?”
“Sure. They got beaches in Antarctica, right?”
“Never get back here in time fer Monday mornin’, dude.”
“So it clocks in late. Blames airline flight delays an’ heavy traffic on tha roads. Typical holiday weekend.”
“Yah, dude. Sure it will. Are you nuts?”
“Hey. Speakin’ a nuts. Ya ain’t said a word ’bout this holiday bein’ … wait fer it … an ice cream Sunday.”
“Dude?”
“Yeah?”
“Shaddap. Just. Shaddap.”
Cherry Chip Amaretto?! Thanks for reminding me! I’m headed to The Doctor’s Office Cafe to fill my ice cream prescription!