She: “Hey. Know what’s cool about being back on the US Mainland?”
He: “The weather?”
She: “That’s not cool, it’s cold! My feet are freezing!”
He: “Hm. I’m just happy to be someplace they aren’t being steamed!”
She: “You’re weird.”
He: “That’s not what my birth certificate says. So … the fact that you can actually breathe the air?”
She: “Sad, isn’t it, that the city smog is actually a relief after the volcanic smog of Hawai‘i Island. But …”
He: “But what?”
She: “You calling me a butt?”
He: “The better to butter you up.”
She: “You watch where you’re going with that.”
He: “Me? I’m watching the road!”
She: “Exactly! Look at all the different license plates!”
He: “Hokay …”
She: “The cars in Hawai‘i, all the plates look the same!”
He: “Yeah. You’d think Hawai‘i was an island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean or something.”
She: “And if you didn’t already know that, six hours of sitting in a shoe box, and an aching back, will give you a clue!”
He: “So you’re experiencing, hm, a certain sufficiency of rainbows? Not to mention, of incredible shrinking airline seats?”
She: “Anything, all the time, gets a bit mundane. Here, we get variety! We could get lucky and see the plates from all 50 states while we’re here.”
He: “Probably not Hawai‘i.”
She: “That’s OK, we’ll make up for it.”
He: “Assuming nobody mistakes us for sardines on the flight home. But I worry about some of those plates.”
She: “Why would you worry about them?”
He: “Think of all the information they’re giving away. Some of which I’m sure they’d rather not be telling.”
She: “What information? Most plates are advertising slogans. Sometimes you can’t even see the number for the selling.
He: “That’s what they think. But look closely, and you’ll see what they’d rather not be admitting. Take that plate, for instance. Really too bad that the state it represents has telecommunications problems. Especially a state with as big a city as Denver in it. I wouldn’t be broadcasting that problem if I were them.”
She: “Where are you getting that? All I see are the number and the name of the state!”
He: “Precisely. Which would be Colortextorado if their networks were networking properly. Amirite?”
She: “Oy.”
He: “Amirite?!?”
She: “No. Since you asked … oh look! Roses! Something else besides license plate variety that you can’t get in Hawai‘i. They’re beautiful! And I love ’em bunches!”
He: “How?”
She: “What how?”
He: “How can you ever have a bunch of roses? They come in rows, don’t they? Says so right on the label.”
She: “Sweetheart?”
He: “Yes, love?”
She: “Keep that up, and you’re going to want to be giving me some bouquetses.”
Licentiousness
Why would any one want to call or text a rado? What is a rado?