Dear Reader,
Your Friendly Neighborhood Amoeba, while (as usual) he was supposed to be doing something else, has compiled, for your reading pleasure, a List of the States of this North American Union, together with key attributes for each one, discovered via the University of the Internet.
The List is configured in such a way as to honor, in an appropriate fashion, the future towards which this Union seems inexorably bound, to judge from its repeated lurching from gridlock to chaos and back again, while its people grow hungry or depressed or both, and the infrastructure on which they depend crumbles around them.
Of the 50 states, fully 21 of them have names that begin with the letter A. It is unknown at this writing how many have proposals before their legislatures to change the spelling of their state’s names, so that they may appear closer to the top of the alphabetical list.
You’re welcome.
ADAVEN
ADIROLF
AIGROEG
“The meaning of the given name Aigroeg represents ambition, independence, strength, reliability, determination, and professionalism.”
AINAVLYSNNEP
Alas, this aina appears to have gone extinct without trace.
AINIGRIV
An artist’s group.
AINIGRIV TSEW
The above group’s incognito fabric artist auxiliary.
AINROFILAC
An aquatic Wild West world populated by humanoid fish.
AKSALA
Means “whole” in Hindi, “great wealth management” in USA Adspeak.
AKSARBEN
The “Knights of Ak-Sar-Ben” purchased a toll bridge over the Missouri River to, eventually, stop the collection of tolls.
AMABALA
Means “spots” in Zulu. Used as a name for people (strangely, not recorded for dogs), for skin-care products, and for a United States Navy oil tanker during World War 1.
AMOHALKO
Redirected to “armhole” by the Ninjawords dictionary.
ANAIDNI
“There is one exact anagram of ‘anaidni’ in Scrabble.”
ANAISIUOL
“The name Anaisiuol attracts expressiveness, sociability, and agreeableness.”
ANATNOM
“The meaning of the given name Anatnom represents compassion, creativity, reliability, generosity, loyalty and a love for domestic life.”
ANILORAC HTOUS
A sci-fi location, populated by NSFW dwarfs.
ANILORAC HTRON
ANOZIRA
Name of a pedigreed attack dog.
ATOKAD HTOUS
Gets as much respect from the internet as its First Nations inhabitants get from its European squatters.
ATOKAD HTRON
See above. Though data are sparse, the Atokads were probably split because of political gerrymandering.
ATOSENNIM
Seriously tries to hide in a corner on Flag Day.
AWOI
American War of Independence.
DNALSI EDOHR
“He was an Elf.” No further details available.
DNALYRAM
“A random rearrangement of the letters will give ‘Amdlaryn.'”
EESSENNET
One of nine answers to a math question.
ENIAM
A branch of the State Bank of India.
ERAWALED
NSFW.
ERIHSPMAHWEN
GNIMOYW
A gardener in Vancouver, British Columbia. Apparently composted in July 2018.
HATU
1-[Bis(dimethylamino)methylene]-1H-1,2,3-triazolo[4,5-b]pyridinium 3-oxide hexafluorophosphate. Presence in saline lakes or on salt flats unattested.
IIAWAH
A work of … something … (sick seagulls?!?).
IPPISSISSIM
Deep South variant of New England ‘wicked pissah‘.
IRUOSSIM
“A random rearrangement of the letters will give ‘Ioirumss.'”
KROYWEN
A trademarked clothing brand. A hip-hop artist in – wait for it – Orlando.
NAGIHCIM
An npc nation in the first Mikon, and the main antagonist of the very first Mikon archipelago wars.
NISNOCSIW
Artwork. Ink on paper (that’s what it looks like, anyway), 2001.
NOGERO
1981 album by Polish jazz ensemble Laboratorium.
NOTGNIHSAW
A legendary culture hero of the poorly-understood Nacirema society.
OCIXEMWEN
Wen the artist runs out of ideas.
ODAROLOC
OHADI
Iranian surname. Persons with this surname unlikely to be found in Boise.
OIHO
An open invitation to snark from Michigan.
SASNAK
“Being from a rural area while exhibiting qualities connoting ultra-urban hipsterism. Used primarily in Brooklyn.”
SASNAKRA
A “Blood Elf Havoc Demon Hunter” in World of Warcraft. A miniscule nation in the NationStates universe.
SAXET
A miniature saxophone, even less playable than the full-sized versions. Ghost town in Shelby County. Word meaning “completely backwards, lacking in common sense“.
SIONILLI
“The Land of Perpetual Youth.” Substantiation of claim unavailable, though it may explain voter behavior in the State.
STTESUHCASSAM
What you see in the rear view mirror after you decide you’re not making it there.
TNOMREV
“A random rearrangement of the letters will give ‘Mretvno.'”
TUCITCENNOC
A failed New England casino.
YESREJWEN
But Syd no wen.
YKCUTNEK
The most dangerous state in the Union, Mitch.
Ingenious enjoyed the read…
thanks
Fabulous. The link I learned the most from had this in it:
wicked pissah (comparative more wicked pissah, superlative most wicked pissah)
Hm. Nathalie, that must have come from a grammarian on COVID lockdown and going stir crazy. A true Yankee will tell you, if dey bothers, that “wicked pissah” is already a superlative, and if you think otherwise, you must be from away.