” … dude?”
“Yeah?”
“… oww …”
“Pain?”
“Yeah.”
“Where’s it hurt?”
“… yeah …”
“An’ ya come whinin’ at me. Dunno why. Seems like it’s what ya get fer usin’ them Windows so-called computers alla these years.”
“Du-UU … owwwowwwowwww …”
“So why’re ya sittin’ there an’ sufferin’, dude? Take sumthin’ fer it!”
“Ya really think throwin’ me in jail‘s gonna help, dude? Ya gonna bail me out?”
“Only afta they’ve given ya some medicine pills an’ made ya take ’em, dude. If not fer yer pain then fer theirs. An’ mine!”
“Well, dude, if’n ya’d said as much in tha first place, I coulda told ya that I did that a’ready!”
“And …?”
“It’s like this, dude. I woke up this morning, an’ tha pain was real bad, all this throbbin‘ and bangin’. Afta a while it stopped poundin’, just like a steady ache, I thought mebbe I could get by. But I finally gave up an’ took tha pills yer pushin’ on me. An’ right away, tha throbbin’ an’ bangin’ started up again!”
“So whad’ya take?”
“A pain reliever. Whad’ya think I was gonna take?”
“Somethin’ worth yer while, I hope. Let me see that bottle. […] Where tha hell didya get this, dude?!?”
“Offa tha internet, dude, where else? And at a real gnarly price …”
“Didya bother ta read tha label?”
“What’s ta read, dude? ‘Pain reliv …” oh.
“Yeah. Oh. Got a clue now how come tha pain came back? Dope!”
“Tried that too. No joy.”
“What’d tha label on that bag say? ‘Industrial hemp?’ C’mon. I’m schleppin’ ya ta Urgent Care.”
“Yer gonna spend dollars on me, dude?”
“Yeah, dude. On ‘count a b’cause mebbe they’ll pound some cents inta ya!”
Haha